The Most Important Sentence: How to Write a Killer Opening
I remember being taught, in English class in school, that a good story should grab the reader’s attention right from the first page. In those first few
hundred words you should introduce characters, create interest and mystery and raise questions in the reader’s mind – questions that they will want to find out the answers to.
But, how much better is it to do these things with the very first sentence? Write your opening sentence like it is a gunshot – blam! - and you’ll have your reader’s attention immediately. Make it powerful enough and as the smoke of the gun clears the reader will read on with the shot still ringing in their ears. They are hooked before they even know it. I’m not saying that something explosive or exciting should happen right in the first sentence, but it should have some sort of effect on a reader. You want their attention, and you want it now.
A good first line should be as good as your favourite film quote. Something that even when taken out of context has power – the power to make someone laugh or think or gasp or grimace. The best opening lines, when read in the bookstore, can make or break the sale of a book arguably even more than its blurb. I may not judge a book by its cover, but I often judge it on the first sentence.
So, how can we write brilliant opening lines? First off, grab a couple of your favourite books from your own shelves and read their first sentences. You may not have really thought about these sentences in isolation like this, but read them carefully and think about what makes them so effective. You will probably find that the best ones…
- Are short and snappy
- Immediately set the tone of the story
- Quickly raise questions that you want answered
- Hit you right between the eyes, often by being surprising or shocking
Keep it simple.
As you will see, one of the most important things for writing a great opening sentence is to keep it short and simple. This is good advice for all writing; there are many posts on blogs out there advocating the use of short sentences and clear writing, but for the first sentence it is especially important. (One exception to this rule is a personal favourite, the opening sentence to Bret Easton Ellis’s American Psycho, which runs way over 100 words and comprises an entire paragraph!) But, in the main, short and simple is the way to go…
“This is what happened.”
The Mist - Stephen King
It doesn’t get much simpler than this. This, the opening sentence to The Mist, is straight out of the Hemingway school of writing. In just four bold words, King manages to get the reader to ask the ultimate question – “WHAT has happened?” Immediately you just have to know, you must find out. He doesn’t even need to hint at the horrors to come, but you just know something bad has happened. Okay, alright… because we know what Stephen King is like we can probably guess that some horrific stuff is going to happen, but that doesn’t stop this from being a good example of how brave, simple writing can hook a reader right from the very start.
Introduce character.
Another great way that opening sentences can grab the reader is by including a character. Don’t wait to introduce your characters, especially if they are out of the ordinary.
“The Iron Man came to the top of the cliff.”
The Iron Man - Ted Hughes
This is the opening to Hughes’ The Iron Man, the children’s story on which the fantastic film The Iron Giant is based. By introducing a character in the opening sentence (it doesn’t even have to be your main character, they could be dead come page two…) you can really suck the reader into the story, away from their reality. Give your character an interesting name or profession and the reader will be putty in your hands immediately. Something like (and I’m making this one up as I write…) – “The clown looked back at the enormous footprints he had left in the snow.” Now, tell me, who wouldn’t want to read on to find out what a clown, in full costume, is doing walking about in deep snow?! A goofy example, but I hope it illustrates my point.
Be shocking.
“We were somewhere around Barstow on the edge of the desert when the drugs began to take hold.”
Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas - Hunter S. Thompson
Leave it to Hunter to know how to hit the reader right between the eyes. I love this opening sentence (also used as the opening line of the film version – delivered brilliantly by Johnny Depp) as it is a great example of how being shocking can work wonders. Thompson introduces drugs (copious amounts, as we soon find out) at the very beginning of his novel, and you instantly know you’re in for a wild, crazy ride.
Set the Tone.
“Mother died today. Or maybe yesterday, I don’t know.”
The Stranger - Albert Camus
Okay, so this is the first two sentences. The first (again, like that from The Mist, it’s very short) is absolutely brilliant, but I think the second sentence really makes it. We are instantly confronted with the death of this man’s mother, but we are shocked and intrigued by his apparent lack of remorse or grief. The distant, apathetic tone of the entire story (and of its main character and narrator) is set in the reader’s mind within these first few words. In fact, these sentences are probably the quickest and most-thorough character exposition I have ever read in a story.
Finally, for my own favourite opening sentence ever, back to Mr King.
“The man in black fled across the desert, and the gunslinger followed.”
The Dark Tower: The Gunslinger
So many questions from one simple sentence! Not one but two characters are introduced within the first twelve words of the story, and we are even given an idea of the relationship between them – the very deliberate use of the word “fled” shows that the second man here is being chased. The air of mystery and intrigue generated from these words is amazing, something to do with the isolated setting and the fact that neither of these characters are given proper names.
As we can see from these examples, the opening sentence of your writing is very important and is something to be given some serious thought and work. Getting it right is arguably more important even than your title. So be shocking, be bold, be brave, be clear. Write a killer opening sentence and your reader will have no other option but to keep reading. There should be blood in that first line, and some sweat and tears too. Or at least the smell of them. The reader will have no choice but to follow the scent.
Please share your favourite opening sentences (and why you like them!) in the comments section below.
Christopher Jackson is the Editor for Fuel Your Writing and a creative copywriter. He is currently working on Project: Snotbook, an interactive children’s storybook for iPad.
One of my favouite books has this at the start of the prologue: ‘ ‘So that’s settled then, we bury her alive in the iron bridle.That’ll keep her tongue still.’ ‘
Company of Liars by Karen Maitland. Fantastic!
I have always thought the first sentence in The Dark Tower was the best, it’s really refreshing seeing someone else who agrees. There seems to be a lot of buzz about opening sentences and titles lately (but that may just happen to be what I’ve been reading a lot about). The first sentence should give a quick sketch of a few lines in the readers’ mind, not try to paint a whole picture. The first line of J.R.R. Tolkien’s Lord of the Rings is an example of what I consider to be ‘information cramming’:
“When Mr Bilbo Baggins of Bag End announced that he would shortly be celebrating his eleventy-first birthday with a party of special magni- ficence, there was much talk and excitement in Hobbiton.”
It could be trimmed down without losing any information, and it really doesn’t leave me with many questions (other than “What’s eleventy-fir… oh. Now I see.”) that need to be answered. Stay concise!
Awesome to see someone else loves that Dark Tower sentence! It really blew me away when I first read it, can’t remember ever feeling like that after reading just one sentence of a novel before.
Great point about the opening to Lord of the Rings. Interesting, then, that the first line of The Hobbit is the complete opposite – short, simple and bold. “In a hole in the ground there lived a hobbit.”
Pride and Prejudice, of course!
“It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune, must be in want of a wife.”
I know I’ll think of others as soon as I post this … ;)
From Michael Connelly’s The Brass Verdict: “Everybody lies. Cops lie. Lawyers lie. Witnesses lie. Victims lie.”
Marquez is a master of first sentences that hook the reader.
Love in the Time of Chlorea
“It was inevitable: the scent of bitter almonds always reminded him of the fate of unrequited love.”
100 Years of Solitude
“Many years later, as he faced the firing squad, Colonel Aureliano Buendía was to remember that distant afternoon when his father took him to discover ice.”
“This gun is not a gun.” Single & Single – John le Carre. This master storyteller never fails to deliver.
That first sentence is your second chance to hook reader (right after your title). In some applications like the Google RSS Reader, this sentence will be shown along with the title. I spend as much time on the lead as the title.
“Nobody noticed him.”
Faye Kellerman’s, Serpent’s Tooth.
Very much grabbed me and made me want to read more. Thanks for some excellent advice and sharing those great opening lines.
Thanks Cassandra, glad you found my post helpful! These are just some of my favourite opening lines, but I have so many! Every time I pick up a book, even one I’m not going to read, I can’t help but have a peak at the first line :)
Peek, Chris, not peak.
Neil Gaiman’s ‘Coraline’. Great opening: ‘Coraline discovered the door a little while after they moved into the house’.
What door? Tell me more Mr. Gaiman!
And I was hooked.
“The man in black fled across the desert, and the gunslinger followed.”
The Dark Tower: The Gunslinger
What up Chris! Definitely my favorite all time opening line too. It’s awesome to see other Dark Tower fans. We’re Ka Tet !
Dark Tower FTW, seriously :)
I have many favorite first lines, but the one that has stuck with me the longest is “By the time that you read this, I hope to be dead.” Nineteen Minutes by Jodi Picoult. I love her work.
I write short fiction and the first sentence I’ve gotten the most compliments on came from Snow Quiet – “My name is Nova because I was born in the back of one.”
Thanks for this terrific post!
I like that first line of yours Deanna! I can really get a sense of the character, even without the rest of the story. Of course, my thoughts of the character might be wrong, but that I have any sense of them at all from the first line is fantastic, and is one of the points I tried to get across. Glad you liked the post!
Thanks so much Christopher! I was quite surprised by this story myself – it went in a direction I never imagined. You can read it on my fiction blog, The Other Side of Deanna, if you like: http://theothersideofdeanna.wordpress.com/2009/10/16/snow-quiet/
Thanks for taking the time to read and comment on Snow Quiet Christopher!
The Paradise War by Stephen Lawhead happened to be sitting on my desk when I read this excellent post :) and so I picked it up and looked inside. Lo and behold: “It all began with the aurochs.”
Brilliant sentence! Really glad you liked the post Elisabeth, thanks for reading.
Oh my gosh, just remembered this one from Dickens and felt like a Very Erudite Person: “It was the best of times, it was the worst of times.”
The first one I thought of but thought it was too obvious.
” I may not judge a book by its cover, but I often judge it on the first sentence.” Great line.
Thanks for the writing tips. I stumbled this post by the way.
“He’ll be your friend as long as you know the difference between there, their and they’re.”
Hahahaha! The best one-line bio I’ve ever read!
p.s. I, too, am sick of seeing these three mixed up and/or used interchangeably. Almost as bad as “definately.”
Clive Barker’s Mr. B Gone- “Burn this book”
Orwell’s 1984 “It was a bright cold day… the clocks were striking thirteen”
From early childhood the totally unforgettable – ‘Where’s papa going with that axe?’
Charlotte’s Web by E.B. White
I only just realised how good this really is when I flicked through Charlotte’s Web a few weeks ago.
Phenomenal opening sentence! Darkness right from the first words.
Thanks for commenting Janet :)
Margret weis and tracyhickmans Dragons of Winter Night
“Tanis half elven sat in the meeting of the council of highseekers, and listened, frowning.”
A personal favorite, Roger Zelazny’s “Lord of Light”, opens with this:
“His followers called him Mahasamatman and said he was a god. He preferred to drop the Maha- and the- atman, however, and called himself Sam. He never claimed to be a god. But then, he never claimed not to be a god. Circumstances being what they were, neither admission could be of any benefit. Silence, though, could.”
One of my favorite first lines is from Nora Roberts’ The Hollow:
“On a bright summer morning, a teacup poodle drown in the Bestlers’ backyard swimming pool.”
I thought it was a brilliant hook. I’m hoping some of my first sentences will be that good. Thanks so much for the tips!
Hello!
I know I’m late to comment, but I needed to anyway. Great article! I am hopelessly addicted to first lines and titles, and it’s something that my non-writing family cannot understand, how delightful to have the subject opened up :) I have so many first lines scribbled down in the backs of old journals, waiting for their ’story bodies’ that shall in all probability never be formed, it’s rather distressing, but as I said, addictive. There is no hope for me :)
My favorite opening line is from a book I have never read! I actually found it in an article about the book, when I read it I literally trembled and tears came to my eyes – amazing!
“My mother used to tell me about the ocean.”
Isn’t that weird? But I want to know more, don’t you? Why was she telling her about the ocean? What happened? There’s a careless sort of longing about it…. hmmm, very intriguing.
Anywho – thanks again. Keep at it!
Better late than never! Thank you very much for your comment Ann.
I have lots of “first lines” written down too, most of them probably forever to languish without a story to go with them.
That first line is amazing! Really want to read that book :)
I believe that book is The Forest of Hands and Teeth. Good read.
That’s correct. This was one of the greatest books I’ve ever read. The story was so complex yet simple. It made you want to explore its world inside-out. The romance and deep drama is 100%. A must to be read in my opinion. Very interesting, and a true page turner.
I love Toni Morrison’s Paradise opening “They shoot the white girl first.”
Wow, seriously powerful! That’s the way to grab a reader’s attention.
I love novels with killer openings, they always make you want to read the rest of the work.
Hey. :) I’m only fourteen, but I really wanted to post. *laughs*
39 Clues: The Maze Of Bones by Rick Riordan — “Five minutes before she died, Grace Cahill changed her will.”
My Thirteenth Winter by Samantha Abeel — “I am twenty-five years old and I can’t tell time.”
1984 by George Orwell — “It was a bright cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen.”
Pride and Prejudice by Jane Austen — “It is a truth universally acknowledged, that a single man in possession of a good fortune must be in want of a wife.”
I’ve read the first one. The rest of the chapters have great opening sentences too.
The Lovely Bones, by Alice Sebold:
“My name was Salmon, like the fish; first name, Susie. I was fourteen when I was murdered on December 6, 1973.”
Blue Highways by William Least Heat Moon opens with ‘Beware thoughts that come in the night.’ Ooooo.
LOVE this. What a fantastic opening line – really sets a tone!
What’s wrong with ‘It was a dark and stormy night’…?
Great openings! I love these examples. Boring writing almost always opens with a boring sentence.
awesome post, really helped me write my personal statement for grad school.
I’ve been writing almost everyday for the last eight years and until now I still practice some of the tips above. They really work.
When I began writing I had always with me this “what ifs” handy notebook where I can bring wherever I go. So when an intuition struck my mind I would scribble down notes from that intuition and wrote the first draft at home.
Most of what I wrote before were short stories since I really loved to write fiction. When I began to write the first draft I just didn’t stop running my fingers on the keyboard. I just wrote whatever came to my mind about a certain idea or a title of a story, or perhaps about a character. I just wrote whatever I can on the pages despite the chaos and the disorderliness.
When I have already written several pages I revised them. As I was revising the pages certain ideas came to mind and that can then add some life into the story or character.
You never know what will come up because ideas just take place while we are revising our craft. After I have reached the point of diminishing returns wherein I felt there’s no other things to revise, that’s the time I would pick the opening sentence or paragraph from what I’ve written.
Revising is the key to an attention-grabbing first sentence.
Here are two of my favourite openings:
Acheron by Sherrilyn Kenyon: “Kill that baby!”
Lord of the silver bow by David Gemmell: To sleep is to die.
Thanks for sharing these! Great examples.
I think William Gibson’s “Neuromancer” has my favorite opening line for a novel:
“The sky above the port was the color of television, tuned to a dead channel.”
That is awesome! I’ve been meaning to read Neuromancer for a long time, that line just pushed it up into Must Read!
wierd question… im writing a book and have 2 ways i want to start it, im not sure which i should do or if they are any good, so here goes “The Priest was ill, I could not let him die before he could save me.” and the one i would like to use “You need to understand my life before you take it, Father.” are these any good?
They are pretty interesting, but I think they give a little too much away, or they seem like they’re trying a little too hard. A good first line is often a little confusing.
Gregory Maguire’s first line from Wicked starts the reader off with so many possibilities. “From the crumpled bed the wife said, ‘I think today’s the day. Look how low I’ve gone.’ “
“When a day that you happen to know is a Wednesday starts off by sounding like Sunday, there is something seriously wrong somewhere.” – John Wyndham’s Day of the Triffids.
Good post here – you’ve picked some great openings.
I’ve not read Day of the Triffids, but I’ve heard that line before. It really is a fantastic opener.
Thanks for sharing Dave, glad you enjoyed the post!
“The end of the world started when a pegasus landed on the hood of my car.”
It’s from The Last Olympian, the last novel in Percy Jackson and the Olympians series. I’d been hooked on the series as soon as I read the first one’s first page. It’s funny yet serious, ust like the tone suggests.
“everyone dies,”
It’s not a sentence, but it is on a line of it’s own, giving the reader time to ruminate on the implications of that hanging comma.
It’s actually the opening of my own novel. Any thoughts?
Not very good. Everyone knows that everyone dies, and everyone’s already thought about it. Characters in books often die too, and people who read know that. You’re not sparking anything new with that phrase.
I guess it’s what comes after that comma that’s going to make or break the sentence
Howl’s Moving Castle, Diana Jones: “In the land of Ingary, where such things as seven-league boots and cloaks of invisibility really exist, it is quite a misfortune to be born the eldest of three.”
This draws me in because I am the eldest of three, and I wonder why it is so bad.
Runaway, Wendlin van Draanen: “It’s cold. It’s late. I’m trapped in here, trying to sleep under this sorry excuse for a blanket, and I’ve just got to tell you-you don’t know squat.”
I immediantly felt sorry the main character, and wondered what situation she was in, and who she was mad at.
The one I always think of is the first line of The Princess Bride. “The day Buttercup was born, the most beautiful woman in the world was a French scullery maid named Annette.”
er, I guess it’s “year”, actually. Probably. I’m finding both. Oh well.
Anne Rice, Interview with a Vampire – “I see…” said the vampire thoughtfully, and slowly walked across the room towards the window.
“Before the dawn of the next day, an unthinkable truth would bind them for eternity.”
My favorite first line has to be the beginning of The Melancholy of Haruhi Suzumiya by Nagaru Tanigawa: “The question of how long someone believed in Santa Claus is a worthless topic that would never come up in idle conversation. Having said that, if you’re going to ask me how much of my childhood I spent believing in an old man in a red suit, I can confindently say that I never believed in him to begin with.”
Well, it’s the first two sentences, but I think it’s the second sentence that really pulls you in.
“Funny…the greatest part was my end.”
Honestly I don’t have a favorite first line, as it is too hard to choose. So I said one from a story that I am currently working on.
But thanks for posting this, because my first line is even harder for me than my title. Like you said, you want to capture your audience’s eyes. But something always seemed to be missing. This have helped me some and given me a few new ideas in the process.