The Most Important Sentence: How to Write a Killer Opening
I remember being taught, in English class in school, that a good story should grab the reader’s attention right from the first page. In those first few
hundred words you should introduce characters, create interest and mystery and raise questions in the reader’s mind – questions that they will want to find out the answers to.
But, how much better is it to do these things with the very first sentence? Write your opening sentence like it is a gunshot – blam! - and you’ll have your reader’s attention immediately. Make it powerful enough and as the smoke of the gun clears the reader will read on with the shot still ringing in their ears. They are hooked before they even know it. I’m not saying that something explosive or exciting should happen right in the first sentence, but it should have some sort of effect on a reader. You want their attention, and you want it now.
A good first line should be as good as your favourite film quote. Something that even when taken out of context has power – the power to make someone laugh or think or gasp or grimace. The best opening lines, when read in the bookstore, can make or break the sale of a book arguably even more than its blurb. I may not judge a book by its cover, but I often judge it on the first sentence.
So, how can we write brilliant opening lines? First off, grab a couple of your favourite books from your own shelves and read their first sentences. You may not have really thought about these sentences in isolation like this, but read them carefully and think about what makes them so effective. You will probably find that the best ones…
- Are short and snappy
- Immediately set the tone of the story
- Quickly raise questions that you want answered
- Hit you right between the eyes, often by being surprising or shocking
Keep it simple.
As you will see, one of the most important things for writing a great opening sentence is to keep it short and simple. This is good advice for all writing; there are many posts on blogs out there advocating the use of short sentences and clear writing, but for the first sentence it is especially important. (One exception to this rule is a personal favourite, the opening sentence to Bret Easton Ellis’s American Psycho, which runs way over 100 words and comprises an entire paragraph!) But, in the main, short and simple is the way to go…
“This is what happened.”
The Mist - Stephen King

It doesn’t get much simpler than this. This, the opening sentence to The Mist, is straight out of the Hemingway school of writing. In just four bold words, King manages to get the reader to ask the ultimate question – “WHAT has happened?” Immediately you just have to know, you must find out. He doesn’t even need to hint at the horrors to come, but you just know something bad has happened. Okay, alright… because we know what Stephen King is like we can probably guess that some horrific stuff is going to happen, but that doesn’t stop this from being a good example of how brave, simple writing can hook a reader right from the very start.
Introduce character.
Another great way that opening sentences can grab the reader is by including a character. Don’t wait to introduce your characters, especially if they are out of the ordinary.
“The Iron Man came to the top of the cliff.”
The Iron Man - Ted Hughes
This is the opening to Hughes’ The Iron Man, the children’s story on which the fantastic film The Iron Giant is based. By introducing a character in the opening sentence (it doesn’t even have to be your main character, they could be dead come page two…) you can really suck the reader into the story, away from their reality. Give your character an interesting name or profession and the reader will be putty in your hands immediately. Something like (and I’m making this one up as I write…) – “The clown looked back at the enormous footprints he had left in the snow.” Now, tell me, who wouldn’t want to read on to find out what a clown, in full costume, is doing walking about in deep snow?! A goofy example, but I hope it illustrates my point.
Be shocking.
“We were somewhere around Barstow on the edge of the desert when the drugs began to take hold.”
Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas - Hunter S. Thompson

Leave it to Hunter to know how to hit the reader right between the eyes. I love this opening sentence (also used as the opening line of the film version – delivered brilliantly by Johnny Depp) as it is a great example of how being shocking can work wonders. Thompson introduces drugs (copious amounts, as we soon find out) at the very beginning of his novel, and you instantly know you’re in for a wild, crazy ride.
Set the Tone.
“Mother died today. Or maybe yesterday, I don’t know.”
The Stranger - Albert Camus
Okay, so this is the first two sentences. The first (again, like that from The Mist, it’s very short) is absolutely brilliant, but I think the second sentence really makes it. We are instantly confronted with the death of this man’s mother, but we are shocked and intrigued by his apparent lack of remorse or grief. The distant, apathetic tone of the entire story (and of its main character and narrator) is set in the reader’s mind within these first few words. In fact, these sentences are probably the quickest and most-thorough character exposition I have ever read in a story.
Finally, for my own favourite opening sentence ever, back to Mr King.
“The man in black fled across the desert, and the gunslinger followed.”
The Dark Tower: The Gunslinger
So many questions from one simple sentence! Not one but two characters are introduced within the first twelve words of the story, and we are even given an idea of the relationship between them – the very deliberate use of the word “fled” shows that the second man here is being chased. The air of mystery and intrigue generated from these words is amazing, something to do with the isolated setting and the fact that neither of these characters are given proper names.
As we can see from these examples, the opening sentence of your writing is very important and is something to be given some serious thought and work. Getting it right is arguably more important even than your title. So be shocking, be bold, be brave, be clear. Write a killer opening sentence and your reader will have no other option but to keep reading. There should be blood in that first line, and some sweat and tears too. Or at least the smell of them. The reader will have no choice but to follow the scent.
Please share your favourite opening sentences (and why you like them!) in the comments section below.
Christopher Jackson is the Editor for Fuel Your Writing and a creative copywriter. He is currently working on Project: Snotbook, an interactive children’s storybook for iPad.


‘At last she had the answer.It came like a bolt out of the blue.She would leave home’. This is the first line of a story I am writing at the moment.How do you see it,folks.
I love it. what’s the book title and author name? let me know when you’re done so I can read it it sounds cool.
The title of the short story is ‘The Flesh Trade’.I am still working on it.
Add me to the list.
Very interesting. Makes you wonder about the rest, you know?
Thank you,Leonia.
“The knife sailed down towards her as he cackled “Pay Up”; and there she died.”
Do you like it? Not many people do..
I thought it was cool. It makes me wonder why he was killing her. Which book is it?
It’s called ‘Paying the Price’.. The author isn’t named and it’s a really rare book.
Top-notch.
“Screams in the dark.” -Darren Shan’s ‘Bec’
What struck me about this book is that it also ended with the same sentence. I loved that.
cool
‘Some people are called; others are chosen.’ Well???
I like it
Thanks. Its just an idea. My book is a work in progress so this one of a few that I’m considering.
‘It has been ninety-seven years since any human being has seen the sun.’
Something I cooked up recently, the book it may be the first line of has been under the needle for a great many years now… First lines have always been my biggest problem.
I like it a lot. And I have trouble with the first line, too. Just got to jump right in and rumage around until you come up with one that’s unbeatable.
That’s a nice opener. So what happened? Makes me wonder. Good Job.
I really like this first sentence. “It was such a long time ago.” It from Autumn street by Lois lowry. I’m writing a book, this is my first sentence. “It was so sunny and bright that day. Too sunny, too happy, I think to mark a day that would change the world” It really two sentences but who cares!
Readers care, and its perfect.
“On a bright, cloudless Thursday morning, Daniel woke up, tied his shoes, and walked out the door of Little Hope Orphanage for the very last time. He did not say goodbye to the others, because he loved them very much, and didn’t want to see them upset. He did not say goodbye to the head caretaker, Mr. Brutus, because he hated him very much, and didn’t want to get into trouble. Daniel was running away, because last night was his seventeenth birthday, and it was time to go.”
The latest project I’m working on. Tell me what you feel.
I like the tone to it. It sounds kind of simple, but in a good way. It makes you curious.
Oh, this is really hooking. I want to read this book! I already love Daniel :D
It was dark inside the garbage bin behind Rafferty’s.
The ticket was, quite simply, daunting. And hopefully she could tell this by how I picked it up between my thumb and forefinger as though it could snap around and bite me.
Please be brutally honest, and should I add “maybe it would–I’ve seen crazier things”?
This is from a book I’m working on–not sure how I’m loving it. Comments would be lovely, thanks a bunch!
Oh, its captivating! Do not give up. You have a great start, and yes, you should add that last piece. Its like a fishing hook that drags the reader in, when they least expect it. Keep up the good work.
I think you should add and maybe it would-i’ve seen crazier things?
otherwise great!
“The death of Torak’s father had hit hard, but that didn’t stop him from running away again.”
What are your thoughts?
The novel is titled “The Heirloom.”
Riviting.
“Sarka never questioned his station in life, but in his heart he knew it shouldn’t be.”
:)
It was the static noise that kept Calvin Teller’s neighbors awake deep into the night.
Opening line for my Nanowrimo novel, what do you think?
“Sadie Blane paced her dark room anxiously, the waning moon illuminating the area of carpte uder her window, but shedding no light on her worries.”
what do you think? please comment!
–Randi–
“She couldn’t recall when was the last time they’d been a couple of normal women and actually worked for their stupid money. Probably never.”
I thought it was a great piece and presented very well. Because of that I would like to know if you could help me improve this,
‘It was then I discovered I was lacking in the downstairs department-if you know what I mean- oddly enough this didn’t seem to put her off so, recognising the rather risky situation I was in I proceeded to explain I was not, in fact the president of Atlantis nor did I give a tree fiddy that-”
I understand that that it is not the ideal short, snappy, simple moreover it is utterly useless fictional drunk rambles which plays no real part in the story however it does start it off were I hoped it would go. Drunk, insane an depressed. I apologise for this.
Man Why can you guys make first sentences so easily I can write everything but the first sentence
The fragile little box fell from mother’s hands, into my cold, stiff hands, never knowing it would be the last gift she would ever give, and I receive.
Eheh it’s from a book I’m writing about a music box and a deaf girl…
I’d appreciate criticism (well not too much or it would hurt) from you folks!
The sentence is really nice. Keep up the good work
There it was, dangling in front of her like a piece of meat in front of a hungry dog, a cruel joke always just out of reach. No matter how far she reached, straining to touch it or how fast she ran, panting until her lungs were on fire, it was faster. All of her wishes on shooting stars were wasted, every eyelash just another piece lost, those quadruple ones shining on the clock were merely numbers. Dreams didn’t come true, magic was merely a parlour trick, and fate was just a silly notion.
Hey guys I’m writing a book wondering if this is a good first sentence “i wasn’t born a killer but i shaped into one none the less” the book is called “Suzie’s garden”
“The End. It comes for all of us – the good, the bad, the virgins. It stretches out its jagged talons and plucks the souls from the dying as they scream. Why do they scream?”
This is the first line of my mystery/suspense book My Sisters’ Secret – still writing.
thank you very much it was helpful
thanks
I am trying to find a good opening title for my newest book.
Which of these do you think are the best?
1. I only discover the way in after I started questioning them.
2. It’s only when I stop believing they’re good that I figure it out.
3. It takes me a moment to realize I’m being abducted.
4. I suppose I shouldn’t begin this story with “Once Upon A Time.” It won’t put you to sleep.
These Are some beguining sentences I’m working on:
#1: The was a loud knock at my big oak door.
#2: He took a deep breath. He could smell the sweat of the locker room.
#3: The girl swept her long blond plait out of her mouth.
#4: ‘How could he not love me?’ she wondered.
Fav lines:
#1: I saw a hand forming in the darkness.
#2: Time has been lost.
So great!
“One night, no matter how eventful, can change your life. For Harmony, it changed in a way she would never have expected.”
It’s something I’ve been working on for a little while… I don’t know if that’s a good first bit or not though… Any suggestions?
They are realy good sentences! If that were a novel I would so want to read it!
This is an excerpt from a book I’m trying to write, but not sure if anyone would like it. This is the beginning to the prologue(maybe):
“Here I am, the last survivor of Halloween. This is like some sick game: when everyone loses, the person who lost last wants to be called a winner. I’ve lost last, agaisnt all odds. Hopefully it won’t hurt to be like the rest. You know, being killed with a pumpkincarving kit and coming back from the dead and all. After all the years of being nice to her, I can’t believe she’s like this. No one bullied her, harrassed her, insulted her; everyone worshipped her. That was our undoing. It’s like, if you’re religious, the whole Anti Christ thing. He’ll pose as the savior, and we’ll be ensnared in the lies. Maybe she really is the Anti Christ, but it’s not like it matters. I’m going to die.”
Sorry, wordie, I know, but that’d still be the prologue. -.-
It made me want to keep reading. I mean, ‘the last survivor of Halloween’, ‘killed by a pumpkin carving kit and coming back from the dead’ and ‘maybe she really is the Anti Christ’? If that’s not captivating and ensnaring then I don’t know what is.
“And so our world ended.”
That phrase popped into my head one night before bedtime…good for asking questions?
“I was being kidnapped. It was dark night, with no moon, and I was ecstatic.”
What do you think? It’s from my book.
What about something like,
1 Time slips away so fast, we don’t even see it coming.
2 The mist hung over the war-torn city like a bad smell.
3 The drone of the school bell rung in his ears.
4 Imagine the power to change it all….
5 Fantasy and reality, aren’t that far away.
Could you please let me know which one you think is best ASAP, so I can start my story call ‘Ubiquitous’. (Ubiquitous means the state of being everywhere at once).
No. 4 is awesome :D
It was between June and November that we realized he was missing. Nothing had seemed to change— anything major, anyway. Like a breath of smoke, it was hard to notice if you weren’t looking for it. We definitely weren’t looking for it. Denial gave way to suspicion and finally bloomed into heated arguments over the morning coffee. He tiredly laid his eyes on each of us in turn, never saying a word or acknowledging that he could hear the verbal axes, lashing into weaknesses until the scene would dissolve. Muttered apologies and stilted conversation made up the rest of the mornings until we would prepare to tackle the elephant of a mute little boy.
He worked hard at trying to kill me. The bigger the weapon the better. what do you think?
I’m starting to write this story and I’m just so curious to know, If this is a good starter.—-”Trust is a weird thing. Something that everyone desires. Someone that doesn’t crave it shouldn’t be called a living person. Trust is what drive us. It is a belief that there’s someone you can rely on. But don’t let this noble belief fool you, as it can be the very thing that guide destruction on your path. Trust is a weird thing.”
Awesome!
Alright, what about this;
“Some of us get a choice; most of us don’t. After all, fate isn’t something that is to be meddled with lightly.”
Or
“Jackson’s right hand trembled as he pulled the bow string to full draw, his vivid blue eyes resting on the target”
Which one is better? Please be horribly honest.
i love the first one … it creates curiosity more :)
Thanks :)
I agree: first one is much better. My reaction is to read on to figure out whats happening. While the second one makes me think of just another Hunger Games clone.
How’s this?
Niki battled with the wind as her umbrella was getting swept away, thunder bellowed and lighting ripped through the hevens.
Howzat! I’ll acept any feedback but nothing realy bad… I’m only 10
Seems a bit long but I like it! Maybe trim a little? And just a quick note: Heavens is spelled with an ‘A.’
Thanks Ellie… I entered a writing comp and… IT’S GETTING PUBLISHED!
another story not that one
Your welcome! And congratulations on winning, that’s pretty awesome. :D
“Pain coursed through his body as he tried to slow down the flow of blood from his arm. It was meant to be an easy mission. Infiltrate and intercept.”
How’s that? I just started writing a novel recently and this is all I have so far.
Pain coursed through his body as he tried to slow down the flow of blood from his arm. It was meant to be an easy mission. Infiltrate and intercept.
hm… Is this a good opening sentence?
“They work in mysterious ways,” croaked Grandpa as he crouched over my father who lied paralyzed across the bitter sidewalk.
Any feedback would be great :)
I’m writing a tale which has opens like this (it’s quite long, it’s a paragraph. The actual first sentence ends with “face.”):
“The moment Bonaventura died, the strangling black that had fought itself a way up to her neck dropped into a Great Nothing and a persistent, almost compulsory smile spread on her ash-coloured face. (Here’s the rest:) She sighed with relief en liberation as the immense pallid rays of hot light radiated through her withered, broken body and the pain faded, only to be replaced by a new kind of pain, a restless flaming which set her bones alight and made her want to faint. She felt her joints melt and her arched back relax. She had been in the bed for twelve days but now she rose and began walking the carpet in elliptical patterns, light as parched autumn leaves in the wind. To her astonishment she saw Giulia and Father burst into tears, their sobs suffocated in cloth. ‘I am here! What for is this wailing? Father! Mother! Caterina! Can’t you see I am perfectly fine!’. Dear God! she prayed bitterly. Dear God, is this what death is like!
Mother did not hear. She covered her face with the black veil that hung from her shoulders, lethargic, lifeless, a motion that was far from human. Bonaventura saw a small, purely decorative tassel that caressed her cheek, briefly, subtly. Black gracing the grave lilac pallor that her mother’s face had reached. But the expression lying around the eyes, the lips, the brow – it was the saddest she had, and would ever see on a human face.
‘Bonaventura,’ she whispered. ‘My starry night. My only, only one.’
I know it’s not quite impressive but I just began writing and I’ve based it on what I saw myself. What do you think?
before this all happened my life was about plans with my friends after school, or what i would say when i suck up to mom to get off grounding. i just couldnt except what i already had when life just expected more. i thought that if kevin rejected me after i asked him to the school dance, then i was so dead. or if dad found out it was me who stole from his whine collection then i was so dead. but it was now that i realize i was misusing the word dead.
because if you dont know the true meaning. then you dont know what its like when you have to kill to live – alora watson
Lolita, light of my life, fire of my loins. My sin, my soul. Lo-lee-ta; the tip of the tongue taking a trip of three steps down the palate to tap, at three, on the teeth. Lo. Lee. Ta.
- from Vladmir Nabokov’s Lolita
I covereed all my tracks,at least I thought I did, I despised them so much that it forced me to murder.
how do u like it